Friday, May 7, 2010

I know this doesn't belong on the world wide web but I don't have anyone to talk to about it in real life (I don't suppose I would talk a great deal about it even if I could) and I certainly don't have much to lose.

At 21 years old I have spent so much time worrying about the way I look that I have let myself turn into a bit of a monster.

Everything is out of proportion with everything else because I keep losing and gaining weight at the wrong pace and in the wrong places, and it doesn't even matter because nobody noticed or cared either way.

I still get out of bed every morning to go to work or finish my university deadlines, I still have friends and I am still alone. I am probably still healthy, but not as healthy as I once was.

In a year, nothing has changed on the outside, but I have wasted a lot of time worrying to myself. The worst part is, I'm not done worrying, not even close.

I guess the point of this is to quote something I heard once;

"If you can't be a good example, you can be a horrible warning."

On the plus side, at least it shows how lucky I am. If I had real problems I wouldn't have time to waste worrying about something so trivial.



  1. On the plus side, you've done lots of good things this year - and you've made and written things which last. That's pretty good at 21, an age which is just a beginning.

  2. well this means more than words do justice, thank you.

  3. Two quotes to consider:

    Marlene Dietrich:
    [The lover says:] How beautiful you are, now that you love me.

    Elisabeth Kubler-Ross:
    People are like stained-glass windows. They sparkle and shine when the sun is out, but when the darkness sets in, their true beauty is revealed only if there is a light from within.

    To paraphrase – “Be wary of the motives of those who find you beautiful” and “True beauty comes from within”.

    Don’t worry about what other people think, just be the best person you can be and enjoy what YOU like – then you’ll find others will want to join you too because you have the right attitude. You may still be alone sometimes but I’ll guarantee you’ll never be lonely.

  4. i love these quotes, especially the stained glass window one, thank you for sharing them with me! x

  5. people noticed